It is coming close to the end of the long weekend; mere days before this school adventure is about to start for real. I am starting to get a little nervous. What if I am not as good at studying as I once was? What if work slips? Will I still be able to earn enough money for the household to survive? If I can’t, what will we, as a family, have to do? Will I burn out? Will I ever see my baby girl for the next couple of school years? How will she respond to me going gone for most of the day? Will I have to give up breast feeding all-together? Should I probably just do that, anyway? She is 16 months-old, after all. Will I manage all the micro-managing as well as I think I can? Can I stick to my schedule? How am I going to be able to juggle my magazine business, a part-time job, parenting, being a wife, friend, and full-time student? Am I completely insane? Probably, but that’s another topic…
The one thing I am very thankful for, as I start this crazy adventure, is all the support I am receiving. The support is key. I know I couldn’t do it without it. I know there will be days when I think I can’t go on, when the magnitude of it all comes crashing down on me, and I am comforted in knowing that there are loving people around me who believe in me, and will help me to see the light at the end of the tunnel. Or at the very least will take me out for a cocktail and a good laugh. Which sometimes results in the same thing.
I am also pretty convinced that I can do this. And that’s important. The schedule looks daunting when I add in all the facets of my life. Being a wife/mother/business owner/woman of purpose, I am well versed in multi-tasking my ass off at the best of times, so this should be just another level of that. And, to be fair, I’ve been busy like this before. In my late 20s-early 30s I worked three jobs, was a single parent, and attended some post-secondary schooling to further my interests. And I managed. Now-a-days it is my hubby and my home-based publication, a 2 night-per-week job and school. And I am not doing it on my own. Looking at it like that, this isn’t so bad at all.
Now it is just getting prepared. I posted my book list up on my Facebook page to solicit friends and family for gifts of a book to celebrate my going back to school. And, thankfully, it looks like I am about a third of the way there already. I still have to fill out all of my grant and bursary applications – that is tomorrow’s work. Hopefully a bunch of those will be accepted, but I won’t know that for months. I have to go and pick up school supplies for my 16 year-old, so I suppose while there I should grab some for myself as well. I wonder where a person could get some cheap deals on binders and paper? I’ll have to check this week’s flyers. Then tonight I will plan out the next week’s menu for the house to save some time and money. Not to mention it will avoid the inevitable inclination to just grab a bag of burgers on the way home and dine a’la Chez McD’s. Oh ya, and finish up the calendar of events and writing my lead story for The Stew (our magazine), and make sure all the ads are in order and ready for final proof tomorrow. While amusing a 16 month-old little girl. Whew. One step at a time.
To be honest, I am quite looking forward to meeting my classmates and the staff at TRU this week. So far it has been a very helpful and friendly experience. No weird looks at being a 40 year-old university student. No questioning why I would want to learn a whole new career in the middle of my life. No big sighs when I brought out my 2-page list of questions. I am pretty pleased so far. Though I still have yet to meet the classmates. That scares me a little more than the staff does. At least the staff is mostly my age.
Well, here goes. Wish me luck! I’ll check in next week after orientation and let you know how that goes.